It's called a breakup because it's BROKEN... take heed
Imagine this: you’ve broken up with your ex and after a few days, (or months if it’s really that bad), you finally manage to get off your tear-sodden sofa for a night out with your mates, only to spot your ex in the corner of the pub ensconced in a passionate embrace with their new fitter, blonder, better-looking date, barely even taking a break from their tonsil-hockey to notice your new haircut!
Yep, suffice it to say that “break-ups hurt like a motherf——”, as Greg Behrendt, author of It’s Called a Breakup Because it’s Broken, muses in his bestselling no-nonsense break-up guide.
So how do you get your ex back? According to my good friend Wikihow, there’s a full proof method to doing it right …
Breakups are never easy ... make sure you're ready to take your ex back before you start begging them to do the same
1. Consider why it is you broke up in the first place. Do you just want him back just because you feel that you can’t have him? Did one (or both) cheat? If any of these things happened, you’ll want to think long and hard about going back to that kind of relationship.
2. Be the person he fell in love with. He was attracted to you because he felt good with you, and you were fulfilling his emotional needs. How have you changed? Correct bad habits and mistakes, if any. Be positive around him. Laugh and smile. Always stay positive to feel good about yourself and make friends around you.
3. The first thing that you say to your ex boyfriend is extremely important. If you say the wrong words, you will lose the chance to get your ex boyfriend back. Do not respond to your ex request for a breakup by crying and begging him to come back. This will not work.
4. Casually ask if he’d like to do something non-committal, like have a drink with friends, play miniature golf, play tennis, etc. Something friends and first dates alike can do. And whatever it is, keep it fun. Skip out on the serious talks for now. You’ll have plenty of time to talk about that later. That’s very threatening to a lot of guys. If he initiates it, follow his lead. But don’t go heavy.
5. Let him know you were thinking about him. Remember that one time you two went to dinner at that great new restaurant and had a fabulous time? Leave him a short email telling him you ate there recently and thought of him. And, by the way, how is he doing? This is a non-threatening way to have a light conversation, and also, a small request for a reply back.
6. Pay a little attention to your appearance if you have been neglecting yourself in that department.
7. If you just broke up (less than a couple weeks) completely ignore him. He will call you if he likes you. If he doesn’t then nothing you say or wear will change that.
8. Remember, no situation is hopeless. Every day, couples get back together regardless of the situation.
9. Find other things to focus on. If you focus your attention on a new activity, you will have less time to miss your ex boyfriend. And if you are still in contact, your boyfriend will notice that you have “moved on”. This will make you more desirable to him!
I have seen too many girls waste away clinging onto a chance to get their ex back, one of which is now clinically depressed, all while the guy has moved on without a care. Pick up yourself and move on like you don’t give a crap, even though you do. My bf and I broke up a few months ago and I didnt bat an eyelid over it even though I was devistated on the inside, and he came crawling back 2 days later. If he wants you, and loves you, he will come back on his own accord. Don’t waste your time and tears on someone who has moved on.
Exes are meant to stay in the past. hoping for more just leaves you in pain.
(And it’s spelled fool-proof, not full-proof. Full proof makes no sense!).
I personally don’t think it’s healthy to obsess over ways to get your ex back. Accept that it’s over and move on. If it’s meant to be it will but there’s no point in delaying the healing process by convincing yourself that you’re going to get back together.